Denmark to Seek Ownership of North Pole

A leaked document lays out a Danish plan to claim sovereignty of the North Pole. Is there no limit to the Danes' evil?

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark – the Scandinavians are hatching a plan to lay claim to the North Pole, according to a leaked government document. A Danish newspaper says the document would be the country's first official attempt at staking out a claim to five areas of continental shelf around Greenland and the Faroe Islands, both Danish possessions, that would include the North Pole. The draft memo says Denmark would seek to have the United Nations recognize it as the steward of the world's most northerly point by 2014 – although we'll be damned if we let those no-good, well-dressed, soft-spoken, architecturally inclined, generally peaceable Danes get away with it.

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