Tories Set to Kill Long-Gun Registry

Emboldened by their majority, the Conservatives can finally catch their white whale. And then shoot it point blank in the back of the head.

Canada's long-gun registry will soon be taken out to an alley to be executed, gangland-style, with the federal Conservatives squeezing the trigger. The Tories are to introduce a bill today that will get rid of the registry for rifles and all the records contained therein. Once it's passed, the bill will fulfill one of the party's longest-held goals, as they've been vehemently opposed to the registry since it was first introduced by the Liberals under Jean Chrétien in 1995. While police associations say they use the registry all the time to make sure homes they visit aren't packing heat, the Tories, and Manitoba MP Candace Hoeppner in particular, argue that the registry is an unfair infringement on the rights of responsible gun owners. Whatever. At least once the blood has stopped coursing out of the registry's bullet wound, and its family is informed that it will have to make funeral arrangements, we can stop arguing about the damn thing.