'Booty Call,' 'Friend With Benefits' Defined, Sort Of

Never again will you have a late-night text message misinterpreted by a recipient with different feelings on your relationship.

A University of Ottawa study looking at the ever-changing types of sexual relationships has come up with what could be definitions for the terms "booty calls", "one-night stands", "friends with benefits," and "fuck buddies." A PhD student at the U of O surveyed a class of undergrads on what they felt each kind of relationship meant, and found there was a surprising level of agreement from the respondents over the terms' definitions. According to the Ottawa Citizen:

• Booty Calls: "usually requested late at night while the caller is impaired, often through a text message. If there is no response, there is no feeling of rejection."

• Friend With Benefits: Someone with whom you started out as friends, but have begun sleeping with while maintaing the friendship.

• One Night Stand: "[includes] staying until the morning, but breakfast, or even coffee, is not part of the bargain. On the other hand, a one-night stand could develop into a romance, and so could a friendship with benefits."

• Fuck Buddy: "suggests a more frequent sexual relationship and the possibility of friendship."

Sadly missing is a conclusive definition of what the amorphous "hooking up" means, as in our experience, it has been used to describe everything from a simple make out, to, well, let's just say a lot more than that. Perhaps the world's first sex school can come to a conclusion over that one.